Well hello and welcome, I’m Suzie Your Wedding VA and I’m pretty psyched to bring you this episode. It doesn’t have a sexy title, but it’s what we’re doing we’re planning a wedding. 


So before we get into it I just want to fill you in about where we are in space and time as this is being recorded. It’s week I don’t know in Sydney lockdown but from looking at my calendar it says it’s the 19th of July 2021, more weddings are having to be postponed and that sucks big time for everyone – especially the couples.  In my last episode we explored how to navigate postponing a wedding, but right now we are putting those sad feelings aside and will be exploring How to plan your wedding – a timeframe breakdown.


Hooray it’s time to plan a wedding – yay!


First things first, do you have a partner, are you actually engaged? 
If you answered no to either of those questions there is no judgement here, you are most welcome my friend, just think how prepared you’re going to be when you DO meet that special person and or get engaged.
Hot tip to those listeners though, don’t have any evidence that you’ve been secretly planning a wedding and the only missing ingredient has been a partner ok?
I won’t judge you but they might. 
In fact Mark likes to joke that I had a secret pink folder full of wedding planning before we got engaged….
Nooooo that is not true… I had no evidence of that folder…. because it was all up here *suzie taps head*
leave no evidence baby. 



Ok and I’m already getting off topic,  it’s time to plan a wedding. Where on earth do you start? In movies it can be portrayed as something that seems super easy or super stressful and as an aside why in tv shows and movies must they get married so quick, it’s  like will you marry me… yes… wonderful lets book the hall for 2 weeks time… wait what?? Also as another aside as an FYI you legally can’t do that in Australia, but that’s for another podcast.


In this plan we are also tackling the ‘looking fabulous part’ yes a hybrid plan! remember that I mentioned I’d be helping you do that as well? Well here I go! 
Now please keep in mind that this isn’t me telling you, hey you’re getting married, here are 5 things you need to do to lose weight.
Heck no that is so presumptuous and annoying.
Not everyone wants to change the way they look for their wedding.
However if I put my PT hat on for a sec from my experience, every single client who came to me as a bride wanted to trim down and tone up. Weight loss and toning, the two most used phrases in my fitness questionnaire.  


So we will have a look at what that means and some suggestions for you, along side wedding planning. Please don’t tune out if you’re like hey hey hey I’m not here for weight loss tell me how to plan a wedding, well calm your farm I’m doing both.

Planning a wedding can seem like a HUGE and daunting task, but it doesn’t have to be. Take a deep breath: you don’t have to plan everything all at once or straight away. Relax. 
This episode is a guide based on a 12-month time frame leading up to the wedding. 
At each milestone there are different suggestions about things you might wanna  be thinking about. 
Don’t freak out if you’re listening to this  with only three months until your wedding. Twelve months is just an average time frame to work with before your big day. No problemo, there’s still things in here for you.


You Ready? Let’s go


Twelve months 
This is where you set your BIG goals and you book your BIG things, the big picture of how overall you want your wedding to look and feel and who you want sharing that with you. This is the BIG time.
It’s time to start stalking and booking your big things. Like your venue, your celebrant or church if its religious ceremony, your photographer and videographer. The big ticket items. The A-team who are the key players involved in making your wedding the way you want it. I’ve got a separate episode coming about how to choose you’re A-team, but for now, my advice is select the big ticket items and book them in before they get snapped up and then you’re disappointed. And do some stalking. I’ve had couples book me who had been following me on socials for months before even reaching out, they stalked me, liked what they saw and then boom I’m in their A-team and we all had a wonderful time. 


It’s also time to think about your wedding budget… yuck, we’re talking money again, I’m sorry its awkward BUT you seriously need to work out what you can afford for your wedding. . If you want a ritzy glitzy reception with 16 piece orchestra playing as you walk in surrounded by swans and your partner wants a wedding bbq at the local park, you two have some serious chatting to do and I’ll leave you to it. Be realistic, Get on the same page and make decisions as a unified team. A wedding is amazing but marriage is better, and starting our marriage in debt from a wedding is not what you want. 


You may also have to have this discussion with other people who may be involved in the money side i.e parents. Try and be clear with everyone what you and your partner are aiming for, that it is your day, your budget etc. I think it’s becoming more common for couples to pay for everything themselves now, but for others it’s the parents who split the costs. Its awkward, its not fun, it may cause arguments, but the clearer and up front you can be about your wedding budget early the better 


 For the health side of things it’s the time to set your big goals for the way you want to look and feel for your wedding, in your outfit, on the dance floor and start thinking, ok what do I need to do to look and feel that way.  We set goals, start making healthier lifestyle choices, and begin your exercise program. 
Wait what did you just say, start an exercise program a whole year out from a wedding? Yes, yes I did. 
Everybody works differently, some need that pressure of the wedding being closer to make them work harder, but I always advise clients to give yourself as much time as possible as people’s bodies react differently and may take longer. 
 
Always begin with measurements: you can do this in whatever way you feel comfortable, scales, body fat percentage, and/or taking some photos for ‘before and after’ or ‘snug outfit’ in their closet. Sometimes the scales don’t always show the way your body is changing and that sucks so go by how you feel in your clothes 
I trained a bride who was obsessed with weighing herself; it made me nervous at each session as the result would affect her mood severely. 
So after she hit a weight loss plateau and stayed there for an agonising three weeks, she finally agreed
with me to stop weighing in. After this, things started changing: her mood lifted, her clothes got looser and she ultimately lost fat from all over her body and felt much more confident and comfortable in her wedding dress. 


And why not test your fitness levels. By recording all this information, you will be able to see how far you’ve come and give yourself a high five.
There are various ways to do this, you can choose whatever you like. An example would be timing how long it takes you to walk/ jog a kilometer, how many squats you can do in a minute, maximum push ups you can do until your arms say “I can’t do any more” etc. Choose tests that feel right for you and are simple to re-test.  Sometimes when the weight doesn’t budge it’s the increase in fitness that is the best motivator.
Setting and working on health and fitness goals has a cross over affect to other areas, it has a positive impact on your stress levels, your energy, your mood, your skin, your body – guess what, that’s awesome, who’s a happy person getting married – you are!


So basically at 12 months, you want to be booking in the big ticket items and vendors and then maybe Create a comprehensive to-do list for your wedding: get all those crowding thoughts out of your head and write them down.
 It won’t seem as stressful when things are on paper and you begin to check them off. But then once that’s done, leave things alone for a while, just enjoy being engaged it’s such a fun time or at least I really hope it is for you.


Six months aka the halfway mark
Ok it’s getting closer, time to stop enjoy being engaged so much and get down to business – just joking, keep having fun. 
In terms of wedding planning, if you haven’t done so already it’s time to look at your other vendors who  will make your wedding awesome. Such as stylists, florists, musicians, all those cool people, they are going to help realise your wedding vision.  Have you chosen your bridal party yet? Or are you not having a bridal party, are you going on honeymoon (oh god please bring back travel again soon) do you want bridal showers/hens etc have you written your guest list? Have you taken people off the original guest list, because the excitement has worn off, you haven’t seen or spoken to them in 6 months and your wedding budget is looking scary? And that’s ok. 

Now for the health side Between twelve and six months is where you want to be losing the majority of your weight if that’s your goal. Ensure you are changing up your fitness regimes to keep your body interested and making adaptations. This is when you will be building lean muscle (to burn fat), and increasing strength and fitness levels.

And when I say lose the majority of the weight, I don’t mean lose a whole heap of weight ok, that is not what Suzie is telling you to do. If it is one of your goals, it’s this time frame where it would be a great idea to do it so it doesn’t affect your dress or outfit fittings, you don’t put unnecessary weight loss expectations on yourself close to the wedding etc. speaking of which PLEASE do not order a wedding dress the size you want to be, order it in the size you are. that pressure for weight loss rarely works out the way you think it’s going to work out. 

Speaking of dresses have you found your outfit yet? It doesn’t have to be a dress but let’s use wedding dress as an example.
I’ve known brides to choose their dress like 8-10 months out from the wedding and others like 3 months, there are no rules. Although, and I might get hate for saying this, but from experience (even my own) when you go to the dress shops the sales assistants are like oh no don’t even think about leaving it less than 6 months, we won’t be able to help you, we need at least 6 months, to order it.
Well, maybe some shops this is true but at the same time this is also a big fat lie. One of my dearest friends had a wedding dress mishap and had to start the search from scratch only a couple months out from the wedding and boom she found a gorgeous dress – no drama. Also who says you need to choose a dress from a bridal store.. ok  don’t let me go down that tangent.

Get help if you need it 
If you need extra motivation for your health and fitness goals, why not look into getting some help?
Ask your partner or friends to join you while doing my exercise programs. If you find your motivation is still running low or your weight loss has hit a plateau it might be a good idea to join a fitness group or have programming sessions with a personal trainer. This is an external form of accountability. A good personal trainer will be able to tailor fitness programs for you, keep you accountable and push you to reach your potential. If you’re on a strict budget, even monthly sessions will still benefit you and are more affordable.
There are also loads of free fitness  apps you tube videos and podcasts on the market that could keep you motivated too. 

Stay calm 
Identify whether you’re stressed out and use stress relief methods if you need to. I will be exploring stress in way more detail in another episode. At the six-months mark things start to get more serious.
How’s that to-do list going? Use it as your guide to check things off and stay on top of things. 

If  you want your hair and make-up done professionally, apart from following them it’s time to book them. I highly recommend booking in trials around this period over the next couple of months, you want to have enough time to be happy  with who you’ve chosen but not have it be too far away that you forget your look – here’s a tip, take photos of your styles, bring a photo of your wedding outfit and flowers so your artists can get a sense of the look and compliment it. And then take a photo of the trial so you can both refer to it again. 

Three months – time to start getting excited
Start confirming your bookings. You may have booked these people agggesss ago and everybody’s communication is different so it wouldn’t hurt to drop a friendly ‘oh hey how you doing’ just checking we’re all on track for so and so, really looking forward to having you be part of our wedding etc etc.  

It’s also nearly time to send out your invites. Some couples send out save the dates to give their guests lots of notice without the finer details and then send out the proper invite closer to.  The majority of your guests are hopefully in your life so will know they will  be aware oh Suzie and mark are getting married next march, how exiting et etc. so the guests know without knowing details.

Some ppl would argue with me about the time frame as to when you should send those suckers out, and yes its absolutely personal choice, you wanna send them out at 5-6 months in advance yeah go for it, but your guests will forget about it.
Your wedding is on the forefront of your mind, not theirs, sorry but that’s the truth.
So around the 6-8 even 10 week mark is standard for wedding invites and yes you may need to chase people for rsvps, it’s annoying yes, it absolutely is, but people can be annoying so yeah, wow dropping the mean truth bombs today. Also if you’re having a destination wedding, more notice should obviously be given.

Healthwise – Remember to change up your exercise program again. Even changing the number of repetitions or grip position of an exercise is enough to add stimulus to the body
and keep it adapting (shrinking, toning).

Are you bored and sick of working out? How about trying out other forms of exercise?
This will renew your motivation, keep things interesting, add stimuli for the body and is often a great stress relief.

Have you tried yoga or swimming? These are fantastic for toning, flexibility and strength. Go shake your booty at a dance class or get out your wedding stress with some boxing classes – have fun!

Speaking of strength – Find your strength
From here, really put emphasis on your strength program; it’s time to get heavy if you have the ability to do so. Keep working on those lean muscles for fat burning and create the tone you’re after. Trust me, you will not bulk up. Unless you’re genetically inclined to put on muscle easily it’s actually pretty hard for women to put on muscle because we have about one-tenth of the testosterone men do. Full body strength programs can be found in Chapter 8 of my book if you need help.

Tweak your eating if you need to 
Pay special attention to your nutrition. And not just for your weight loss goals, think about the effect a good diet has on your energy your mood, gut health, swelling (remember your outfits we don’t want bloat) and your skin.
If you need help making these nutritional changes please seek a professional.
When you think about eating think about this, would you put crap petrol into a Ferrari? Heck no, well guess what you’re a Ferrari… 
Speaking of Ferraris anybody else really into F1 Drive to Survive, I am the most surprised at how much I like that show, anyway…


One month 
Time to maintain and do some last-minute planning.  There are some aspects of your wedding planning that you really can’t do until closer to the wedding, for example seating charts, the logistics of the day, rehearsals, are you writing your own vows, final decision making arrghh, now’s the time to slowly revise that to- do list and really stay on top of stress levels.

Keep up the good work 
If you have hit your desired weight, it’s time to stay focused on maintaining your strength program. Think firm, smooth body…think weights, baby! If you still want to lose more weight, let your seamstress know and have a tailoring plan. You don’t want your dress falling off during your wedding day…that’s just awkward! 

Take time out to de-stress 
How are those stress levels going? Remember to chill out; everything is going to be OK.
Remember this is about marrying your loving partner, your best friend. In a month you won’t have to worry about who is sitting next to who and whether the chair covers will match your theme.
Re-check your to-do list and be sure to delegate if you feel you won’t get everything done. In fact, delegate away, but please do so in a nice and realistic way of course. 

Confirming the final details 
In this month before the wedding it’s time to confirm bookings and make final payments to your wedding suppliers in the few weeks leading up to it. Get as much as you can done now so that during the week of the wedding you don’t feel overwhelmed. 

Speaking of which – 

Week of your wedding 
Hooray! You’re nearly there, my friend!

This week should be about tying up those loose ends, and making final confirmations. Yes, trust me, you should confirm several times in the overall process. 

For one of my weddings  I get a phone call from the bride who was due to arrive in 10 minutes that the photographer hadn’t shown up, they had the wrong date booked in their calendar,  thank goodness it was a Tuesday and the photographer wasn’t at another event, we were delayed an hour but it all came together. 

 It wasn’t the couples fault or responsibility to make sure all their vendors arrive when they have booked them too, but I always wonder if they had confirmed would that mishap have happened? So please confirm for peace of mind. 


Pampering 
Be sure to book yourself in for some pampering this week. Time to treat yo’self. Facials, massages, meditation, manicures, reiki, whatever you do which makes you feel amazing and relaxed, book appointments for that the week of the wedding.

Have a facial at least a few days maybe even a week before the wedding, it’s not recommended you have one the day before or even two days before, just in case your skin has an adverse reaction to any products. 

My beauty expert from my book told me day 2 of a spray tan is the nicest so keep that in mind if you’re getting s tan, now this goes for gents as well, facials, massages and tans etc are not only reserved for women, not at all. 

Practise walking and posing 
Walking down the aisle with good posture is absolutely essential; you’ve done so much work you need to show it off perfectly. Walk with a book on your head, walk in your shoes, your dress or outfit and on different surfaces. Practice, practice, practice. 

Speaking of practise, don’t be weird or anything but do you know if you have a good side for photos, do you stand super awkwardly?
Maybe have a chat with your photographer about how to get relaxed in front of the camera and speaking of photographers have you got a list of photos you want captured like family, specific friends etc. give them a list of what’s important to you two, if you don’t ask you can’t receive. 


Last-minute workouts 
This may sound over the top but I advise my clients to do daily high repetition mini workouts focusing on the areas that will be on show, every single day of the week of the wedding. What you do and really focus on in these workouts depends on the type of dress; for example, exercises may involve working the arms, back and core if you’re wearing a fitted dress, the bum and legs as well. 

One of my previous brides wore a super-fitted dress; we worked extremely hard on sculpting her the perfect bum for this dress.  I’m not even kidding, it was my mission and we succeeded. So guess what her homework was for that final week? Apart from arms back and core, she had HEAPS of glute work to do; they needed to be showed off and appreciated! 

In high repetition mini workouts you are working in what we call the ‘endurance phase’ – maintaining your muscle and tone – and you should not experience DOMS (delayed onset muscle soreness) from them so you’ll be fine.

You can play around with whatever exercises you wish, just make sure they’re high repetition and include core/posture muscles. Remember what I said about the flow on affect of exercising? Your body loves it and will love you right back. 

Getting pumped 
This one I recommended to my previous clients, so if you’re keen and comfortable to do so I recommend having a final heavy strength workout a few days before the wedding.
This allows for any muscle soreness to go away before the wedding day, but gives you a last final ‘pump-up’ for your muscles to keep them in line, especially those posture muscles. 

On the wedding planning side of things, I always chat with my couples a few days out from their wedding.
Its close enough to the wedding so that final decisions have been made and we’re all set but far enough away so as to not add to their last minute to-do errands or add any stress.
Ask your vendors any questions you may have for them, confirm, run through the day, do whatever you need to do to feel satisfied that everyone is on the same page and then let it go and leave it up to them. 


Try and have your to do list finished by the afternoon of the day before if not earlier. There are last minute things you may need to do like pack an overnight bag for the wedding night, blow dry your hair for the stylist, give your bridal party of loved ones presents etc. but you also need some down time the night before. 

You need some quality sleep and to chill the heck out, you will most likely be up at sparrows fart tomorrow so relax and get to bed as early as you can. 

I did not sleep a wink the night before my wedding because I was sick and had taken too many Sudafed, when I saw my make-up artist in the morning I just said, please work your magic, and thank goodness she did… I looked like a zombie that morning lol 


Day of your wedding 
The morning of your wedding don’t forget to do your mini workout. Previous clients have reported to me that even their simple mini workout was enough to make them feel great and that their body was ‘ready’ so to speak.

Eat something, I get that you probably have  a lot  going on, people at your house, vendors, loved ones, there’s a lot going on, but you need to eat. Your wedding day is really long, you need energy and if you plan on drinking, something to line your stomach. 


I recommend a run sheet for the day and that both parties have a copy of it, everyone knows what’s happening and don’t freak out if things don’t happen to the minute. 

Trust your vendors to provide the service you paid them for and if something needs chasing ask someone to handle that for you. ie a trusted loved one who can follow up on something. 
ENJOY! Breathe, relax, have fun and absorb everything. 


Take a few minutes out to stop and be in the moment, one of the best tips mark and I received was to take a few minutes to be alone during the reception and just take a moment to reflect on what was happening. It was awesome, we were so happy and could just savour a few minutes being chill in the love bubble before getting back to the dance floor. 


Now this has been just a brief overview of the planning aspects and how to look and feel awesome. There are some sections which I am itching to share more in depth about, so we’ll get to that. 
But for now and with what we’ve just covered, planning doesn’t seem so scary does it? You got this!


Ok here’s our random fact for this episode – The word “muscle” comes from a Latin term meaning “little mouse.”